did you miss me?

i know you did.

im off work!!! its been a trying week. im getting back into life- i have a phone again. and i fouund out i can get the camera i had on amazon for $50. yay! theres been some drama at work reguarding the security videos and i had to write a lil nasty email and cc the hotel manager. im not above that shit. i am a pro with the emails.

now that im done typing about the drama of my life, which im even tire of talking about but that shit is everywhere, on to the good stuff!

my mommy and i had a lil date today! we had appetizers at longhorn, then went to the civic center for the "America I AM" exhibit. pleeeeease go see it! please! it was awesome! and im still mad yall didnt see king tut! but for real. 500 years of african americans. beautiful. also? packed. you should go on a wednesday. we spent most of the time waiting to see stuff. but then again it just opened friday. so there's that.

those of you that have twitter, follow @walmartAIA and get you some tickets! please!

anyway i had a great time with my mommy. she's a trip! she was talking about people all in kroger! lol. talking about what people had on and everything. thats where i get if from. who knew? she even wore her afro out today and we kinda looked like twins. in our lil african inspired garb (her a caftan with lil yoruba people on it, me a dress with reeds and some less descript african pattern). there are pix but wehad to break out my old film(!) camera.

i'll try to go less than a week before i have sumn interesting to say. lol

robbed

yes, i was robbed.

i was at work, my purse was in the back of the store, as usual, and some guy was lurking around and stole it. he left my purse in one of the back rooms, empty of anything of value to him.

that includes my wallet, which had no money in it but did have my marta card, my check card, and my ID. my camera, my phone, and my brand new zune. so pissed you guys. im more calm now... i cried, kicked shit, yelled a lil, and drank on an empty stomach. but now im waiting for a call from the atl police. well technically my mom is waiting for the call. she's the only one in the house with a phone as of yet. my bro still hasnt got his stuff together since he was robbed.

im wondering why this keeps happening to my family. what did we do? we're nice, god fearing people! we take precautions! geez man... its just shitty.

and he stole my pepper spray. womp. and i cant go get more cuz i dont have an ID so i cant get into starship! super womp.

facebook repost

so i was gonna post sumn else regarding facebook, but then this happened. long story short, my brother go robbed on the way to work. he's fine, but without phone. the following is his status on fb after it happened, then his friends' responses:


JMJ asks.... Sooooo what is a man to do when he's robbed at gunpoint on the way to work for an honest day's pay??!! BULLSHIT!!!

KH at 11:52am
Wat who this happen too........

JMJ at 11:53am
Me... At about 10:15 today...

DA at 11:53am
What the hell? Umm... JMJ, I hope that this didn't happen to you!

TS at 11:58am
Dude are you serious! Where were you?

TB at 11:59am
Damn thats crazy. But hey if u still wanted to try what we were talkin bout (beyonce tix everyone's trying to get)u can do it today. Let me know if it works

JMJ at 12:00pm
Down the street from my house... Don't try calling my phone... They took it. So, if u want, either just send me a message, or hit me up on Yahoo Messenger. TB I don't have the necessary amount in my acct right now. But I'll try anyway. I want to go to the bank... But, u know.

TS at 12:00pm
Did you report it to the police?

SG at 12:01pm
Darn cous, srry to hear that. Better your phone than you though!!! glad you are ok

DA at 12:02pm
Damn, this is really fucked. Exactly what all did they take besides your phone? I really hope you reported it to the police.

JMJat 12:02pm
Yeah. Luckily, there's a police station right up the street. I was literally right around the corner from there when I was robbed. And they said it has happened two other times from the same guys.

DA at 12:04pm
Well that's good at least. I hope they catch these guys. And if your card was taken, you need to call and cancel it.

JMJ at 12:04pm
My phone, my carmex(DAMN MY LIPS R DRY!!), 12 bucks, some pens and my headphones. They're not exactly good at robbing people cuz if I was in their shoes, I woulda searched the person. But I still have my wallet, camera, and house keys that were on me. I still have my card.

SG at 12:05pm
not the Carmex !!!!!! LMFAO

DA at 12:06pm
Oh okay, goody! It still sucks that they took stuff from you, period! And I already know how you're feeling with the phone... and especially the carmex. Lol! I'm just glad that you're safe most of all. It could've been worse. Hope you get another phone soon.

TS at 12:08pm
I agree

JMJ at 12:08pm
Yeah. If there was only one of em, gun or not, I probably woulda fought him... It might be stupid, but I woulda been workin on impulse.

KH at 12:16pm
Im sorry love im glad u safe...........

JMJ at 12:24pm
So am I

DAJ at 12:31pm
So you're telling me that more than one person robbed you at gunpoint and only took your phone, $12, some headphones, some damn pens...and your Carmex??? What the fuck is wrong with our people! That's it... I'm Native American. We can't even rob right anymore. This confirms the vast downward spiral of the black community.

JMJ at 12:33pm
Lol right... Cuz he made no effort to check for my camera, my wallet with my bank card, or my house keys... Though he didn't know where I live... Point is, he coulda got more for his pathetic display of justlearninhowtostealness.

DAJ at 12:34pm
You should have asked his dumb ass if he wanted your socks too.

JMJ at 12:35pm
lol he probably woulda taken em. Then my feet would be uncomfortable.

DAJ at 12:36pm
Ha! Well at least he wasn't a complete fool and you're alright. Now you can go to work and be a bitch at RT! Yay!

JMJ at 12:37pm
Nah, I was on my way to work. I called them while I was at the police station, and my gm told me it was kool if I didn't come in.

DAJ at 12:38pm
Ok good. They should pay you for that day seeing you lost money... but that's just asking for an arm and a leg. You should get a gun.

JMJ at 12:39pm
Lol why would I get a gun? Totally outta my character.

DAJ at 12:40pm
Because guns are cool... duh!

JMJ at 12:44pm
ATTENTION EVERYONE!! I STILL HAVE MY CARMEX. THANKS.

DAJ at 12:45pm
Woo moist lips! [nohomo]

JMH at 12:47pm
lol soooo homo!! jk

JoyCJ (thats me, in case you werent on the up) at 2:30pm
Yall are a trip! Did your carmex fall in that loose pocket you have? I put out the word on my status cuz I really want those guys caught. A lot of my peeps live of (the main road).

JMJ at 2:30pm
Yeah. I found my carmex Joy! The apron pockets are deeeep!!! Thatz wha's up though. Black Dodge Neon!!

IT at 3:24am
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW I KNEW NOTHING ABOUT THIS... SO SORRY, JMJ... AND JOY U PROBABLY THOUGHT I WAS SO INSENSITIVE FOR NOT ASKING IF LIL BRUH WAS OK WHEN I SAW YOU TONIGHT.. BUT I AM JUST LEARNING OF THIS SITUATION VIA STATUS BROWSING!!! *sorry for yelling* ..but like everyone said, I'm glad that you're ok.. black dodge neon, huh??!?!?!?! :-( ...i didn't do it!!

JMJ at 3:26am
Lol I know you didn't. There was no tag on the front and I know yours says "N'DIYA." Its iight. I think they'll get caught. Mean time, where can I get some p-spray?

IT at 3:37am
p-spray??

JMJ at 3:38am
PEPPER... HUN. PEPPER.

ITat 3:42am
damnit i knew it was gonna be something i would feel retarded about questioning... Boy... my ass sometimes... I tell ya the truth!!!

JMJ at 3:46am
LOL BUT I LOVE YA NONETHELESS.

JoyCJ at 3:47am
Hardware store or starship (a sex shop on the main road).

JMJ at 3:56am
OH OK. THANKS!

IT at 3:58am
lol@ pepperspray being at starship... boy i swear... people these days!!!! we've taken 4play to a whole new level... *ok I'm done*

JMJ at 4:01am
LOL WELL THEY HAVE KNIVES N SWORDS TOO.

JoyCJ at 4:05am
thats where i got mine.

*please note the time frame of the conversation. 20 hours!!! it was a very long day. and i was up the entire time.*

back in the A!

i have unceremoniously returned from Cross/ Eutawville/ Casey south carolina. my grandfather's funeral was quite an event. i'll be sure to tell you about it and the days surrounding, i just dont feel like doing it now. i just wanted to leave you with some pix...

remember that gigantic field i saw when i was 7? its still gigantic.

my dad, brother, and me. please understand that this pic is rought (or is it raught?) with thoughts and emotions, and that i hate that hes holding me by the stomach as if im pregnant, especially since i looked really thin that day. and my brother looks mighty retarded. and my dad has the country ash. but there will be more on all this tomorrow... or later today rather

update

i didnt realize i hadnt posted in a week almost. sorry...

im headed to south carolina tomorrow morning. woo? i get to see alot of my family, but of course it is my grandfather's funeral. and its in a town of 6000. theres more people in my hotel on a 100% occupancy day! ive been stealing wireless from my neighbors. i dont even know if i'll be connected to the world, lol.

i know that sounds random and irrelevant, but theyre the things that go through my head. sigh. i really didnt know my grandfather, what with moving to atlanta 14 years ago. its sad but its strange too. im really going to be there for my father. i know. i havent talked to him in literally years, but thats not important. i imagined how alone he'd feel if he saw that his children werent there. i'd hate to hurt him like that. regardless of his warantless abandonment of us.

anyways, this is my grandfather. breezy said i looked like him. "that nose!!" lol. i agree.

yippee!!!!

i got my computer!!! it looks like this:

and you can check out its specs here. it turns out that kesi's internet means his house has wireless, so i probably wont be getting my own connection. i'll just shoot him a fiver every now and then, lol. itll be here sooner than i expected and i'll love it forever. yeee!

i also finally got my party pix online. this is actually the anniversary, but, bygones:

he is smiling, btw. i know its hard to believe.

and here's me and my lil brother.

aw, siblings.

i get it from my mama!

yeah these are a tad old but i wanted to share. arent they nice? she pretty much sticks to baby blankets but she's bad a--. i wont curse cuz she doesnt like that.

a few announcements

firstly, my youngest brother turned 20 saturday. we saw cadillac records, which was great. i admit i had low expectations, but it was a well done movie. anyway here's a pic of us at a party we went to a few weeks ago. its weird that we ahare friends and go to parties together when there was a time i couldnt get rid of his behind. i know im making a weird face but, yeah.

this is a video i took when kesi and i were out for his birthday fun. lmao!


lastly, i have a few new things up at my crochet site. check em out

ahhhh!!!!

so im packing for kesi's and my 2 day get away to luxurious downtown atlanta, and i move my bag, and what do i see? this lil homey on the left side of the pic.... for reals, i am a friend of all things reptile, but this lil gecko dude freaked me out!!!! i tiptoed upstairs and squealed at my mom and brother that there was a lizard in my room!!!! my mom seemed unphased: "why dont you just pick it up? i thjought you liked those things." yes, when theyre outside and not hiding in my room since god knows when! geez. so my bro followed me downstairs armed with a pringles can and chased the poor lil thing around the room. then we got the idea to cover it with a chip bowl and slide something under the bowl to trap it (actually this was kesi's idea, when i told him he may have to come get me if the lizard wasnt trapped asap). then we started taking video. yes, parts are dark, but i think that the audio is worth the listen, especially when my brother and i go into our geico impression.

80

Today is my grandmother's birthday! She's 80. How cool is that? I talked to her earlier while she was eating lunch and she told me she wasn't in the mood for cake. That's fine. I'll have a cookie in your honor. I lived with her for a few years when I was younger, so I know she doesn't like to be fussed over. This task can be a hard one, considering that you have so many offspring, and especially so when you turn 80. We had a surprise party for her 75th and she smacked my cousin (lightly) for not ruining the surprise. I have a great pic of her and Kesi and she's giving him this look. A look that says, "you may be new here, but you should know I don't like surprises!" ever since then she's been trying to steal him from me, lol. of course she had fun. Sat at the head of the table, and when it was time to cut the cake she prayed and thanked God for the (big) room full of people that loved her. You couldn't help but get a lil emotional over that. I miss her. Hopefully I'll get to see her soon.

In conclusion, I just found out I can mail pix to my blog, so I'll leave you with one. The oldest and, as of right now, youngest members of my family.
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random

isnt this a cool lil pic? my brother doodled it after kesi's brother sent him a text msg about seahorse sandwiches (all very strange, i know, and i cant explain it). what kills me is that this lil drawing has so much to it! what also kills me is that he got all the art talent from both our parents. i mean, i cant draw worth a ding damn. i can tag though... i did some grafitti on the same paper. not my best work, so i didnt bother to take a picture of it, lol.

kesi and i went to see "semi pro" last week. Good movie. funny. It wasn't at anchorman level, but I enjoy will ferrel in general, lol. That sex scene had me dying though! I really wanna see Horton hears a who but I don't know if he wants to. Meh.

I'm listening to the first DK album right now. Still bumpin! I'm resisting the urge to just belt it out in the streets right now. I mean, this album, there's maybe only 1 song I don't like and its near the end, so it doesn't stop my flow at all. *oh, oh oh, we show stoppin, show, show stopin!* I can't wait til Tuesday! I'm going to get the album 2nd thing (after my bathingsuit, which my baby is buying for me). Its called "welcome to the dollhouse." has anyone else seen that movie? Its so funny! Ms lady and our brothers must have watched it a thousand times! "wiener dog!!" lmao. Please, if you haven't seen it, watch it. Its gotta be one of the best indie movies I've seen. I ended up with this weird crush on Brendan Sexton because of that movie and one where he played a lil thug who liked this puerto rican girl whose dad was abusive. Hurricane streets! Oh my God that one was even better than WTTD. And he was in empire records. With liv Tyler and Rene zelwiger. Marvel at my encyclopedic knowledge of 90s movies featuring awesome actors, not just "movie stars."

This dude just asked me if I knew anyone who wanted to buy a psp for $50. Boy, if you don't get out my face! That reminds me of this lady Friday, who came in the store and tried to pay with a 50... Turns out it was fake. Turns out, she sold her second tix cuz her team lost, and the random Joe on the street paid with a fake bill. She felt like pure ish. I mean, it didn't even have a watermark. It was a good fake, I will say that. If we didn't have the markers, we probably would have accepted it.

So yeah, tornado. Hit atl. Did you hear? I took pix, and I think as soon as I get a chance I'm gonna do a big photo catch up session (the pic my brother drew was in my drafts). I had to go to the highest floor of my hotel to take pix of the CNN center and the westin, which you can't even get close to. As far as Marta I'm pretty sure they're not letting people off at the CNN ctr station... Its all very crazy. I uttered about it so I'm not gonna repeat myself, but I will say that even during the storm I underestimated what exactly was going on outside my job. But everyone I know is ok. There were a few close calls, including a friend who I'm sure has to move and one whose back windows blew out from the pressure while she was driving home.

Last but not least, guess who I met yesterday? Andrew young!!! He's so sweet! And a joker. I told him I loved seeing him on the colbert report, and he says, "yall didn't know I could sing, did you?" lol I was trying to get deep with him, about the whole strike thing, and how he and mlk negotiated with colbert's dad to end the nurse's strike in SC. And his wife (who is bangin in that Claire huxtable way) said SHE didn't even know that story before he told it on tv. And despite all the bull and drama, this is why I love my job. Who among us can say they met and had a silly convo with the man who has a street not 2 blocks from my job named after him?

i fell asleep, and when i woke up, all the chicken was gone!

spent christmas day at my aunt linda's house. let me just say straight off that i did not see my brother or my dad. but i still had a good time.

my cousin chelsee (her grandma and my dad are sibs). aparently we look alike or sumn. lol.

what a cutie!!! my cousin tika's youngest daughter. she has 3 kids and i thought the guy who was there was the father of the youngest two... he wasnt. so T gets around, lol. but baby was sweet!!! her name is joy too, her middle name i think. She kept trying to grab the camera, but I wouldn't let her. I did let her grab my lip and she scratched the mess out of it. Looks like someone punched me in the mouth.

my brother is a pure tard. i was trying to be candid here... the chick in white is T. she made some curry chicken and some peppered fish (she's jamaican) that i really wanted to try. after my first helping i took a lil nap, and when i woke up, all the chicken was gone!!! wtf? there was a full pot! grrrr. so disappointed.

i think kesi had a good time. he spent alot of time down in the kids' room playing wwe and other games, so there was a win, lol. everybody loved him. when we were waiting to eat we went through my aunt's 8 million photos. apparently we're alike in that way- we love to take pix.
one thing that kinda disappointed me was that i was not in too many group pictures. there were lots of family events but i didnt really recognize alot of them. i guess its cuz i didnt spend much time with my dad after a certain point. i remember vividly our trip to Six Flags Great Adventures, and the trip down to SC for my grandma's funeral. and there were a couple of other ones of me in there... but my brother's 1st birthday? i had to have been there, right? my dad was there. sigh. its ok. we're peeps now. she had a picture of the first time we met as older kids, and i didnt realize until yesterday that it was at that point (me 16, him 12) that he was already almost taller than me!!! we all looked the same shade because the boys were outside sweating and playing (even the youngest J, who is an inside kid) and i was at softball practice all afternoon. i really wanted to take that pic but there was only one copy. but there was plenty of this one!!!wasnt i cute? this is me and my cousin amin. kesi says i still wear hoodies like that (uh, dude, you just bought me a hoodie, dont be hating!) and lauren says i still look like this. i know i still make that face. and my cheeks are still HUGE!!! lol

so i had a great day. it was nice to see my people again. we'll have to do it more often. i hope i can convince my aunt to upload at least most of those pix...they were crazy!!! my parents at 18, my dad's pix from when he was about 8. me when i first moved to ga (id really like to borrow and BURN those).

baby pix

*For more, are ms lady's blog@ Alyseshaunte.blogspot.com*


lil braylon, trying to look at us, despite the fact that he had not yet openned his eyes... grandma (my aunt) gushing.

the hand off!!! look at her smiling!
the happy family. (there were two cameras...)

11 36 44

Do these numbers mean anything to you? Of course not. But they mean a lot to me! 11= mom, aunts and uncles. 36= me, my brothers and all my grandma's grand kids. 44= great grand kids. 91 people spawned from lovely Anna. Can you believe that?! Wow. And 1/9 of us lived in my house when I was 14.

Back then, we had lived in East Point for 3 years. My aunt D was living in CT, and aunt Stacey was in Tampa, I think. Somewhere swampy. I don't know much about Florida. It seemed they both decided, simultaneously, that it was time to make a fresh start. Its all good. We lived in a 3 bedroom house and my mother had turned the front den into a master bedroom. So we had space.

Now that I really think about it our house has never been just us. My mema, other family, my "aunty" Rachelle, the devilish woman who lived with us last year (ugh. Let's not), so on. My mom's always opening up like that. Especially family.

So anyways, aunts move in, and we somehow make it work. I have bunk beds, my brother has bunk beds. Ms Lady and I sleep in my room, her bro Jay and my bro sleep next door. Aunt D is in the master bedroom, and I think this is where my ma got her habit of sleeping on the couch. My aunt Stacey and her 3 kids, Imani (5), Jordan(2) and Jared (lil pookie baby), sleep in the other bedroom.

Aunt Stacey was so paranoid! I can see why, now that I'm older. I'd be on the phone after school, and she'd have the operator cut her in to check on her babies. "and get off the phone!" we'd have to stay off til she got home! Do you know how hard that is for a high schooler? And wouldn't the phone NOT be busy if something was wrong? Like if one of them was injured I'd carry on my conversation? Ok. And I don't recall having her number to call her. So, if something did happen... There were very important things to talk about to the people I spent all day writing notes to! Why didn't we have call waiting?! So many questions!

The bigger boys tore their room up! My bro is not a rambunxious (i don't know how to spell it!), but Jay totally is. Even now. So he'd try to goad my brother into wrestling or play fighting him and it turned out so bad! They'd just end up pissed at each other. The only times property damage ensued was when Jay was outside throwing acorns in that mock romance way, trying to get my bro to come outside. And he threw one THROUGH the window! Sigh. No hiding that from the parents! Then there was the bag, full of books, through the wall. They hid that one for a long time. In another house, one boy tossed the other through a wall. Big holes.

Ms lady and I would put words in people's mouths. We'd amuse ourselves by watching our moms doing something across the room and add the vocals. I remember one of us using the line "no, you're wrong! This is just like when we were kids!" and cracking each other up. They never knew. They'd be so wrapped up in paperwork and plans and we'd have them talking about all kinds of nonsense.

What else? Oh shopping was insanity. We'd have to buy diapers every day! I mean we, cuz big people would give us money, and lil people would head to the CVS where I'd inevitably work. Like 3 gallons of milk at a time. If you want something, hide it! You like that cereal? You get one bowl of it, you're lucky. We'd have day and night shifts on dishes. And you better do them your assigned time, cuz if not you're doing the next person's on top of yours and messing up the rotation. If you're of a certain age, you have to sit at the table.

Speaking of the table... The chairs. Oh my, every chair was broken by the end of it all. I don't know how but it seemed like the tops slid off the chairs and people fell through the frames! Hillarity! We were checking chairs first before we sat down.

Everyone had their moments. Imani stood on the fireplace mantel and sang "we fall down" and would not stop! She just kept, "we fall down, we get up! We fall down, we get up!" and we're like "yay!" thinking she'd stop! And she wouldn't! Lmao! My aunt was like, "thank you mani! Thank you! You can stop now!" And her darling lil brother, one day, he's sitting on the bed crying. He was my lil buddy (I seem to get along with the toddler set) and so I say, "Jordan! What's wrong pookie?" and pick him up and let him cry in my lap. And then I realize what's wrong... He pooped on himself, and was in trouble. And now I got boo boo on me! I had to put him right back down on the towel I'd somehow ignored, his comfort be damned, and clean myself. *shiver* And then Jared. I can mention this since he is alive and well... I let him roll off the couch. Twice. Ms Lady was yelling at me from the kitchen, "hold him!" I was all in the tv or something. She is a born mom. And he would forward roll to the floor and giggle. And so I prayed he wouldn't grow up a lil slow... And he didn't! Whew!

Oh reminiscing is so fun! Eventually aunt Stacey moved back to CT, and aunt D moved into her own place. We missed them. That was definitely a memorable few months.

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just so you know...

me and mar on monday, trying to stay cool. arent we bedorable? he kept saying "cheese! ok, another one!" i had to distract him with ice pops or i'd still be there posing.

My new best friend.

Ok, lemme give you some info on this guy: his name is Mar, I've known him almost 3 years, he's really cute, and he likes to be naked, like 24/7.

Of course I'm talking about my baby cousin, AKA my shadow since Tuesday. He and his mother (my cousin), came down that day, and they're staying for the long haul. His grandma (my aunt) is here too, and is headed back Saturday. So anyways Tuesday was the day he started calling me George, and the day he did naked cartwheels in the livingroom before bath time. My friend asked, at what point does a naked human stop being cute? When they're old enough to know what other things can happen while naked besides cartwheels.

So yes, he's my lil shadow. First thing in the door he's asking, "George, where's turtle?" so he helped me feed mikey, who is outside because mom had to fumigate. When I go down stairs, "George, what you doing?" and by the time he gets downstairs I'm headed right back up. Poor lil short legs. No wonder he's so fit. He has a belly and when I mentioned it he tried to suck it in. "George, I'm spiderman!" and he hisses and flicks his "web" at me.

But there have been bad times... Wednesday he had troubles making it up to the bathroom, what with all the stairs. Also I think the newness is scary for him. He's still a baby so he didn't get in too much heat. And he at least made it in the bathroom before peeing on himself...gotta get my suede sneakers out of there...

Also, Mar is a morning person. I'm a night person. This is the only issue with our relationship. "George, wake up!" No George will not wake up, George is sleepy. Its 730, and George just barely got to sleep. How do you explain to a 2 year old that some people are on a night schedule? I do everything at night: talk, IM, crochet, watch tv, clean, the list goes on. This would be inconvenient, if not for the fact that everyone I'd deal with us awake at this time. Except Mar. Sleep by 10. Knocked the eff out. And then he's up at the crack of dawn asking about turtle and throwing my flip flops across the room.

So he's been my homie since Tuesday. My cuz is pregnant now, and I'm sure the 2nd boy is gonna be equally hype and in love with me. Lol, or possibly not, but he'll still be lovely and adorable and I'll treat him like a prince. Cuz I know I'm not gonna spoil my kids, so I gotta get that outta my system.
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mema time.

so i sent my photo to my grandma, my favorite person. did she get it? she didnt call... so i called her.

yay! this is what we talked about.
1. my picture was lovely. she was just saying that she wanted new pictures of her kiddies. so far she's got new ones from my cousin frankie, and me. and she tried to pronounce kesi's first name. lol i was like dont stress mema. she calls him "my little boyfriend." not as in mine, but hers. she is in love with my boyfriend! its all good though.

2. my cousin nicky is doing well. she is diabetic and just had her third baby. apparently mema thought i was her for a minute.

3.my cousin geno is having a baby too. his name is a mix between geno and his baby mama's last names. needless to say, my grandma cant say it. its like, ferchave or something. i'm so concerned about my new lil cuz and that name.

4. my cousin crys's mom is sick. i mean, real sick. less than 100 lbs and on a breathing machine. she smoked ALOT, so much that i know the scent of benson and hedges and think of her when i smell it. she might not make it.

5. my little marmar is too smart! he's my favorite cousin's son and he's two. he got a spanking and called my grandma and cried over the phone. then when mema said, give your mama the phone, he hung up on her! like, no, i'm not supposed to be talking to you! he's so bedorable.

6. we have to buy dreamgirls as soon as it comes out on dvd. grand usually doesnt go to the movies so she's got the hits rolling on the dvd tip. so my ma ranted and raved about how great it was. we gotta do that for her.

ah family. ups and downs. i really miss them. my ever growing collection of cousins. every time i go there's more family to know. and love.

happy new year.

stuffed

today was a good day.

i woke up at the boo's house, way too early. mama in law was up cooking and blasting music. btw there's no food except thanksgiving stuff so i have nothing to eat for breakfast. or lunch, seeing as how i went back to sleep and woke up at noon. ah. but now i'm hungry. so i get up and sit in the kitchen where everyone is doing something. i ask for something to do and end up cleaning the tables which i hate. i have to be compelled to clean. things that compel me to clean:

*utter ickiness (Like turtle poop)
*need to impress- this isnt my house, so its null.
*The knowledge that i'm a little messy
*Money- i clean at work.

i hate to clean for other people. i can never do it the way they want and it annoys me. luckily i was just cleaning tables... i was to volunteer at a shelter today at 4. but our car is leaking oil- >:-s - so i had to wait for the in law to take me home so i could leave. wack. i was late but only by a little bit. i also overdresred. why was it a million degrees out? and me with my bubble coat. ha!

we get to the shelter and announce that we're here to help. the guy outside says, you with the white people? que? rude! and yeah we are asswipe. my mom's friends are already there, ingrid and sabrina. ingrid brought some church friends. sabrina is a missionary. wow. the whole thing is pretty easy.its a wonder more people dont serve food. so many are needed.

we make plates and serve sweet tea. the kids are beyond adorable. they are bedorable. this one lady had three kids, one was an infant. angel. he just stared at me then when i pouted he started smiling. works every time. the women in there, man they drink some tea. i kept coming back to refill. they all grubbed, yo. there was tons of food. we ate too but i didnt eat too much cuz i wanted to wait for mom's food. plus i felt wierd about eating food i was supposed to be eating. even though there was alot left over. kid you not, after everyone finished, a guy came by with a literal truckload of food. bread, juice, sodas, veggies... the lady said they were set for the week. only a week? gee. then hosea feed the hungry (a big charity here) dropped off leftovers from their dinner. wowee.

we even had candy for the kids. this one girl got upset because she wanted to help pass them out. we just wanted her to enjoy it and sit for a minute and she was all over cleaning up. she just wanted to help and she was so little. like 9. she wanted to help inventory food and mop and everything. so cute.

my brother, the big hungry almost man that he is, took a cake and two pies home. did i mention he already had cake at home? he's fat-brained. we made a pledge to donate our old fridge- which is currently in my room taking up space cuz we cant get it up the stairs- so they can put all that food somewhere. headed home and ate so much. so good! oh my mom is the bestest cook. i took a photo of the turkey bone for memories. man. i'm sleepy. and i had a great day. pictures to come soon.

chicken pox: a story with no real point.

althea got chicken pox last week. she came back to work with scratch spots all over her. adults still GET chicken pox? gee whiz...

i got chicken pox when i was 7. i may have contracted it at my grandma's funeral. one of my cousins had it and gave it to everyone. but she also lived upstairs from me so i may have been a carrier...

my grandma lula mae was born and raised in monks corner, sc. my grandfather too. as it goes, my mom's dad was born in rome, ga, so i have a deep southern heritage that i try to deny. anyway, monks corner was a 14 hour ride away, on a coach bus with family members who i knew and didnt know. my mom sat in the front and my dad in the back. not because they needed to be separated, but because they werent together anymore and werent bound by compromise to sit near each other. i would bounce back and forth on the bus to one of them or the other, and bug relatives for snacks and to hear what they were listening to on their tape players.

south carolina was CUNTREE! as compared to the biggest city in connecticut, complete with projects and latin gangs, i was in the deep woods. whole new experience. big as crickets and mosquitoes... i swear i had never seen a field before then. a "hills are alive, hey is that corn?" field. i played until dusk with distant cousins and came in the house dark as a tollhouse chocolate chip.

it was there that i smelled the worst smell i'd ever. some meat maybe, boiling on the stove. even with the lid on it filled the house with the stench of death. chitlins. the "c" must be a typo. i asked my mom what it was and she told me intestines. i thought she was joking. ew. i picked at that night's food.

that small town was beautiful. even though i was there to say good bye to my grandma i have really good memories. but that doesnt suprise me. she lives in every scarf or blanket i ever crocheted. its funny, all my life, she was sick. diabetes. she had her leg amputated and her prosthetic would sit next to her when she was watching tv, with a flat black loafer and a knee high stocking. i would touch it and look at her missing lower leg, but i wasnt afraid.

she made great iced tea. it had a whole lemon in it. cut, of course.

so i got chicken pox at her funeral. couldnt go to school for a week, and i actually liked school then. my dad had to take care of us when my mom was at work. we played all day and at one point i climbed into our jennifer couch and made my dad look for me before i jumped out and scared him. i know he was probably thinking my mom was gonna kill him if i wandered out into the street in a fever hallucination. he once sent me back home without bathing me and she's still mad about that.

dont they call it shingles when older people get pox?

internally fat.

alton brown is eating a pig's foot. i almost hate him, but he hated it.

i love 'good eats'. i love the food network in general. but especially this show. every night at two i watch alton tell me how to better cook my food. btw, i havent cooked anything other than the ramen noodles i just polished off in a very long time. but i watch him cook because its unbelievably intriguing.

when i was 11 i met a man. his name was steven. he was so smart. and he kept my interest. he made me laugh, and made me smart too. he was a dork but the kind that makes you wanna be just like him. whenever i got bad grades he'd look at me in a way that let me know we both knew i could do better.

this man, steven, is the reason i'm good at math. also, the reason i ended up with such a smart man myself. also, my best friend's stepdad. we call him dad.

alton reminds me of him. he's a smart man who takes the most simple of subjects, melons, for instance, and makes you sit there for a half hour and listen to him talk about why cantelopes are really musk melons in america because you can only find cantelopes in europe.

now i'm watching his new show, feasting on asphalt. he was in savannah- he's from toccoa and tapes mostly in ga- eating a pickled pig's foot as a cultural experiment. he interviews owners of restaurants about their love of food and its effect on their lives and the people around them. great show. must watch.

btw, i'm internally fat because i'm small but i love food. most people think i dont eat. but man- i am a slave to my appetite. i believe in good eats.