its saturday

and im off. just cruising the net, as i am wont to do. posted some new pix on my crochet site. updated my blogroll, in case you were looking for something new to read. check out spritestitch.com, where i am getting some great ideas... i think that's it!!! oh yeah, i love the postal service (mailed stuff out thursday and shani-o and my other recipient got it today!!!) and i hate the oil barons( 45 minute wait WITH traffic cops just to get gas? wtf?).

Le random

*apparently my ex, Ken, drunk texted a mutual friend of ours bitching her out because she suggested they watch "Juno" and he didn't like it. Whatever he texted her was so rude she wouldn't repeat it. This is a grown ass man ladies and gents, getting mad over a movie review.

*my thumb swells when its hot out. Why is that? Sometimes its my pinkie, and only on the left hand. It gets tight and itchy. Weird.

*the devil's gatorade strikes again. I had put it in my locker after it offended my shorts on Friday (btw the stain came out in the wash), and I decided last night I was thirsty. After getting home late last night I picked it up when I got out of the car, and it spilled all in/on my purse! What the?!? I didn't even bother to take it in the house. I just threw it in the trash. Bitch ass gatorade. I knew I shoulda got vitamin water.

*red ink heals really nastily. It looks like an open wound. Or like "the white meat," as we call it when you really skin yourself and you see the vessels under it? Either way its bad and wrong. Interestingly enough, my flower turned brown as it started healing and now its turning red again. Its like it wilted and died and then came back.

*when I went to Psycho Sisters to get my scarf and shades (see pic) there was a lil white girl, probably about 7, singing jeezy's "put on for my city." she knew all the words and was trying to put in some notes and whatnot! Then I started smiling at her and she got all shy. It was so funny. Imagine a lil girl singing "call me jeezy Hamilton, flying down campbellton..."

*speaking of lil girls, I love that commercial where the lil girl has a dairy queen fort and her dad gets played by her, then when he comes back the dairy queen is "closed." so funny!


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5 senses

i just finished reading "when you are engulfed in flames" by david sedaris. last year Jameil advised me to read another of his books and i fell in love with him. im passing that book onto my friend sammy sam because she saw david on the daily show and fell in love with him. i recommend you buy this book. the thing that inspired the title? pure comedy. i was quoting it and laughing and people were very concerned about me. lol so buy it ok? its definitely inspiring the short story writer in me. how he remembers all this is beyond me. but im glad for it.

i just bought NERD's "seeing sounds." im listening to it now. there's a song called "kill joy." damn!!! be that way pharell! after all ive done? psh... anywas i really like "anti matter." the chick on that song, you can almost hear her neck rolling, lol. also, the drums on this album are on point. i love drums. i wish i could play. im not very good at multitasking my whole body toward one thing. i tried once, and got upstaged by a drag queen.

kesi and i just got from Yasin's seafood. i had a po' boy and he had enough whiting to feed his whole family... i mean even the ones in missouri, lol. it was so good. his mom said i be leaving food in the fridge all the time. i dont mean to!!! i just be forgetting! i leave the house at like 2 in the morning and im not thinking about my leftovers. in the middle of the conversation and i was like "ooh you got fudge pops?!?!?!" she was semi amused. but damn it if i dont want that fudge pop right now!!! btw there's half a po' boy in the fridge....

i want that fudge pop so bad cuz its hot!!!! i mean, record breaking temps down here. and aside for a total of 20 minutes the past 2 days, we havent seen rain since aprilish. im sweating in really not nice places. i'll let you think about that. i had a temper tantrum the other night because i was sweating behind my knees. at NIGHT!!! evil! who does that? full dislosure, ive been trying to go without a bra as much as possible. i am currently hating these gifts god has given me, simply because they require a harness. on the upside, its perfect weather for Whitewater!!!! we're going to the water park!!! i plan on spending quite a bit of time in the lazy river, getting my puffy blue-black (or in my case, caramel-bronze) on. kesi will be getting his amber- honey on. light skinned people always remind me of baked chicken at the end of summer.

because its hot and rainless, the water stinks. algae overpopulation for about the past few weeks. its gross cuz then you smell funny when you get out of the shower. you dont smell fresh and clean, you smell like algae, which iosnt bad, just indescribable. and at work, its interesting to wash things in this smelly water. rinse things out. some places had up signs that said "water smells today, we suggest bottled water." its not bad to drink, but im sure it has a tinge of sea monkey to it. you know what else smells? chai. i dont know how los angelista drinks it so much. maybe it changes with the milk. but once i got it on my hands, i then had to choose between smelling that or the weird water. i chose the water cuz its not brown and sticky (btw all starbucks use filtered water in beverages, so dont worry!). in ct sometimes the water would be brown, and they'd tell us not to drink it. but it never smelled....

Jury duty pt 2

Well this part is a little different than part 1. For one, I was writing that as it happened, and I couldn't do that with this part as I was actively in the court room and phones and such were not allowed. So here's what happened:

They called my name. #7. I literally let out a sigh of disgust. And so I went down to the 5th floor and stood in line while a lady told us what would be happening. We'd go in and be surveyed (guadiere, I thing that how its spelled. Pronounced "gwa-deer") and chosen or not chosen to be in the jury based on our answers.

So of course being #7 I was right in the front. Center. And the dude next to me would NOT SHUT UP. At first it was funny, but then he said, "he's guilty," when we found out what the charges were. Not funny. Btw it was the state vs this young immigrant who was accused of sexual assault of a 12 year old girl. So yeah dude, shut up. The immigrant dude looked like he was having it rough up on Wright St. His eyes were red the whole time. I know they treat rapists hard up in the joint, and with good reason, so...

Certain things could be implied by the line of questioning. There was forensic evidence. If the forensics did not incriminate the defendant, I don't believe we'd be there. You know? If the DNA was someone else's, we wouldn't be looking at this guy. Also, the way the defense lawyer asked his questions made it seem they could only put reasonable doubt in your head, maybe, possibly. On a good day. I wouldn't want him reppin me. He wasn't too tight in the game.

So we get on with the questionaire. Do you know anyone in the courtroom? Would the influx of Latino immigrants into the US effect you negatively in this case? Do you have police or military relatives? Do you watch law and order or CSI? (when they asked this question, people were like, what about "cold case"? What about "48hrs"? Damn, just say yes. You get the idea.) Has anyone close to you been arrested? do you have an negative experience with the police? Positive? Do you have a scientific, counseling, child care background? Do you have children? On and on. And then there were 2 questions I was the only one who answered in the afirmative: do you speak Spanish? Were you personally the victim of a sex crime?

Now, admitting you were the "victim" of a sex crime can be a hard thing. First of all you have to move past victimization. I don't feel like a victim. It was a part of my past and makes me who I am. By not saying that it happened, 2 things occur. I make myself ashamed and a liar. (btw, Mr talkative gave me the side eye when I answered this question. I was actually thankful he clammed up and looked at me differently.) I did no more to deserve the actions brought upon me than I did when my house was robbed when I was 19. The other thing is a perpetuation that its going to be something we should be silent about. Its not. I once sat in a room where a large majority of females admitted to having been a "victim" too. No one would have known otherwise. But by us saying it, and there being males in the room hearing what we had to say, I can guarantee it had an effect on them. So while I am pretty sure I wasn't the only one who was involved in a sex crime, I was the only one to admit it. And that's fine. I don't want people to think they can ever be in a room full of people and assume that none of the women there have been offended. And next time, maybe every one would be able to admit it.

As far as not knowing Spanish... Really? 60 people in the room and the only ones who speak Spanish are me and the defense? These people had a crazy diverse background, and I was the only one who could communicate with the people who are literally running to live in our city? Boo!

So moving on. After this, we took a lunch and then it was specific juror questioning. Something I found funny was one man's response:

"where does your wife work?"

"oh she's retired."

"from?"

"north Carolina."

Dude. Not what she meant. I really wanted to laugh.

My questionaire was long. I talked about my brother's and uncles' military service, my dad's and cousin's arrests, my functionality in Spanish, whether or not my personal experience with the crime would bias me (I said it wouldn't. I'm able to see that this guy is not the person that hurt me), and my job. After that, I went in the hallway and squeezed in next to a nice old lady who was eventually chosen. I'd first seen her earlier because she was sock-footed. Someone had taken her shoes! What the? She was 74! And walking around the courthouse since she'd gotten there with no shoes on. Her daughter came after lunch and brought her a pair from her house. We talked for a while, and she was talking to me for a while. It took me a second to realize that Jackie was her daughter that died of diabetes in 2004 (yes, we really talked) because she talked to me as if we'd known each other since back in the day. She grew up in warm springs, the home town of Eisenhower, I think she said. And her dad worked for him. Was he the one in the wheelchair? That's who she was talking about. Anyway, we talked about her time as a private investigator at "Girls Friday" in roswell. That name reminds me of a strip club even though I know where it came from.

So after a while, a long while, remember I was #7 of 50, we went back into the room and the judge talked to us about "striking" jurors. He said they'd take a 15 minute recess and we'd be out by 6. Lemme say that first of all, we weren't. 2ndly, I'd been in that building since 8am and I'd been up since 6am. So I was beat. After almost a half hour, the lawyers came back and striking began. Now, I've seen them do this OUT LOUD before but never in this "passing notes in class" way that was occuring before me. No one said A WORD for another 20 minutes. A court worker passed a. Few sheets of paper back and forth, writing here and there and passing, whispering, while we sat there bored and not knowing what's going on. Then finally they had a jury and they called 13 people and then the judge thanked us and we were on our way. It was 630! I spent 10.5 hours in there only to not get picked. And I know that the fact that I was the only one who admitted to what I did was the reason why. It was the only thing that set me apart to the point of being a "biased juror." meh, whatever. I could see how that could hurt your case, lol. I went to kesi's house and went to sleep. Now I just sit back and wait for my $25.

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Jury duty pt 1

*This was written in the juror waiting room before I was sent to a judge. There'll be more on that specifically later on. There's a lot to mention. I will say, clearly, that I did not get picked, so there will be full disclosure.*

I've been up since 615am. Ate my breakfast of oatmeal and Vault and took a shower. Got dressed and tried to leave the house. "you can not go to court dressed like that!" ok, so I had on a fuschia top with a dancing monkey on it (which some have referred to as racist, but its an aeropostale shirt and its cute), and I was thinking more of my picnic date with Kesi in Centennial after I'm done here (because they never keep me long), but I knew she was right. It did make me laugh a little after a while. But um, its hot outside and I was dressing for comfort. I aint putting on a dress! And certainly not tweed pants, as she suggested. I changed into a blue Nike golf shirt. I really look like I'm gonna golf today. I have on tan above the knee capris- I know these type of shorts have a name, but usually I would just barely be waking up this time of day, so- and some loafer sneakers with tan, blue, pink and lime dots. I actually saw a guy with a similar outfit on who looked like he actually owned clubs.

Anyway, I get to the courthouse and they take my camera temporarily. I just gotta make sure I keep this raffle ticket they gave me. I remembered to take my knife out of my purse, didn't think of the camera... Oops. anywhoot, I get to the 7th floor and there's this line that stretches to eternity, because they're not letting people in as a group. You have to check in first and there's 2 people at a windo checking in oh about 300people. Give or take. Maybe 200. Still, that's a lot of people. And I'm tired! I'm listening to Frank Ski, and apparently its Usher Day. Btw, his album sounds pretty wack. His son sounds adorable. Put him cooing for an hour on wax and I may head to Target. But this album? Bah. Not that I own any usher... I hold my r+b dudes to a very high standard. I have Maxwell, Robin thicke, um.... Shoot that's it. I think. I've digressed again.

So I get in the room, and then we watch a movie with channel 11's own Brenda Wood, all about what the hell we're doing here. I don't remember what they said. I was paying attention but my brain was still asleep. I just realized I may be the youngest person in the room. Lol someone in here's last name is "Cooch!" *dead*

So I've been sitting here since then and I am trying to hold on. Reading and playing on my phone. I finished my book 2 days ago. It got really good, at the last 3rd, things started getting really twisted. I mean even moreso than usual.

*****************
At 11ish, I got chosen for jury selection. Of course I can't tell you anything about it. I'm eating lunch now... If I get chosen for the jury then I won't be able to comment on the case until a verdict comes in. If I don't get chosen, you'll hear all about it tomorrow. Some funny things have happened already. Funny odd, not necessarily funny haha. Til later...
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Ask and she shall receive.

*Rashan. Please look back to Feb when I wrote about camping, "Jameil doesn't like camping" or something like that, to read about the guy who's in love with mariah Carey. Suffice it to say that she's the only woman he's ever loved, if you know what I mean. Anyway, he changed his status to reflect his actions today. His profile pic is still Mimi though.

*apparently TI isn't on house arrest... Or something? Bah. Anyway he was giving away $100 an hour as part of a radio promotion/ community service. How do you calculate that though? Is it a whole weekend of service, or just when they tell you to call in? Btw I didn't call in. I had to work.

*I'm finally off! Yay! This was a hard won day off too man. I'm not gonna tell you how my feet hurt, I was on my period, and I had a little meltdown in the bread aisle at the Kroger. I'd just like to thank my baby for putting up with me while simultaneously putting me in my place.

*well, what can I say. I'm 11 days closer to Miami..

*still can't tell you about the work drama. But it got a tad juicier, and some faces got tightened, lol. But its all good for the Joy!

*kesi's mom got me a sundress! And it has yellow in it, so... Also blue, green, purple, and fuschia. Its black backgrounded, yet still summery. And can we point out that this was kinda out of nowhere? She's so nice! I'll take a "speech" anyday if they come with presents.

*the evil manager is still a dirty bitch... And no one will stand up for her

*got me some haagen dazs cookie dough icecream. Its good but it wasn't soft! Like, usually when I buy blue bell, and I first open it, its soft. But not the HD. I had to fight it... But it was still good, and it kinda kept me from eating too much...

*Look! I turned one post into 2! Lol. I'm still delirious from working, but I think I'll be better tomorrow. We're going to chili's! I have not been there in a... Possibly ever, really. I mean my bf/ BIL's/ brother works for their competitor, so why would I? But who wants to go eat what they cook all day? Not Kesi. So we're going to chili's to hang out with our friend dani. We haven't seen her in like 2 years, when she and another friend performed at this showcase. People used to think we were related in high school. I think its cuz we were the same shade of brown. You know how people are. So we expect to hear that tomorrow. Until then, holla!

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random

isnt this a cool lil pic? my brother doodled it after kesi's brother sent him a text msg about seahorse sandwiches (all very strange, i know, and i cant explain it). what kills me is that this lil drawing has so much to it! what also kills me is that he got all the art talent from both our parents. i mean, i cant draw worth a ding damn. i can tag though... i did some grafitti on the same paper. not my best work, so i didnt bother to take a picture of it, lol.

kesi and i went to see "semi pro" last week. Good movie. funny. It wasn't at anchorman level, but I enjoy will ferrel in general, lol. That sex scene had me dying though! I really wanna see Horton hears a who but I don't know if he wants to. Meh.

I'm listening to the first DK album right now. Still bumpin! I'm resisting the urge to just belt it out in the streets right now. I mean, this album, there's maybe only 1 song I don't like and its near the end, so it doesn't stop my flow at all. *oh, oh oh, we show stoppin, show, show stopin!* I can't wait til Tuesday! I'm going to get the album 2nd thing (after my bathingsuit, which my baby is buying for me). Its called "welcome to the dollhouse." has anyone else seen that movie? Its so funny! Ms lady and our brothers must have watched it a thousand times! "wiener dog!!" lmao. Please, if you haven't seen it, watch it. Its gotta be one of the best indie movies I've seen. I ended up with this weird crush on Brendan Sexton because of that movie and one where he played a lil thug who liked this puerto rican girl whose dad was abusive. Hurricane streets! Oh my God that one was even better than WTTD. And he was in empire records. With liv Tyler and Rene zelwiger. Marvel at my encyclopedic knowledge of 90s movies featuring awesome actors, not just "movie stars."

This dude just asked me if I knew anyone who wanted to buy a psp for $50. Boy, if you don't get out my face! That reminds me of this lady Friday, who came in the store and tried to pay with a 50... Turns out it was fake. Turns out, she sold her second tix cuz her team lost, and the random Joe on the street paid with a fake bill. She felt like pure ish. I mean, it didn't even have a watermark. It was a good fake, I will say that. If we didn't have the markers, we probably would have accepted it.

So yeah, tornado. Hit atl. Did you hear? I took pix, and I think as soon as I get a chance I'm gonna do a big photo catch up session (the pic my brother drew was in my drafts). I had to go to the highest floor of my hotel to take pix of the CNN center and the westin, which you can't even get close to. As far as Marta I'm pretty sure they're not letting people off at the CNN ctr station... Its all very crazy. I uttered about it so I'm not gonna repeat myself, but I will say that even during the storm I underestimated what exactly was going on outside my job. But everyone I know is ok. There were a few close calls, including a friend who I'm sure has to move and one whose back windows blew out from the pressure while she was driving home.

Last but not least, guess who I met yesterday? Andrew young!!! He's so sweet! And a joker. I told him I loved seeing him on the colbert report, and he says, "yall didn't know I could sing, did you?" lol I was trying to get deep with him, about the whole strike thing, and how he and mlk negotiated with colbert's dad to end the nurse's strike in SC. And his wife (who is bangin in that Claire huxtable way) said SHE didn't even know that story before he told it on tv. And despite all the bull and drama, this is why I love my job. Who among us can say they met and had a silly convo with the man who has a street not 2 blocks from my job named after him?

mutterz

I finally did an Utterz. As I state on it, I didn't know what to talk about until today. I didn't mention that if you think was talking fast its because I was trying not to say "um," which happens when I am leaving messages on answering machines. It was very weird that I was talking to no one in particular...

Now I'm off to add Jameil and rashan to my circle so I can listen to their Utterz... After my night minutes start.

same dress

So stace was talking about how she used to jump fresh in high school because the games and events were like the end of the world and you MUST look fly, right? Well I never went to games in hs because I was not that type. By high school the only thing that would get me to a game was if Lauren was cheering. Especially if you had to PAY to get in, please. Anyways... That's not what this post is about. Its about when I DID jump fresh.

Back in the day the magic Johnson theater was the jump off! I kid you not, Lauren and I and our other friend who was also named Lauren used to put on dresses and get fly to go see Scream3 or... What other movies were out in 98? Shoot we'd go to the movies every 2 weeks or so but that's the only movie I remember us seeing.

Anyways, this was 1998, remember that as I delve into this outfit. Imagine a mod style dress, zipper back, above the knee but still school appropriate. Sleeveless, kind of uniform style in the cut of the arms. Large overlapping floral design that kind of looks abstract.


Its lime green.



You heard me!


I had enough lime green in my wardrobe to warrant lime green patent leather sandals.


Yep. I'm not shamed.

So mo and I are at work today, and we're talking about just this: how fresh we used to get for the smallest of events (her event was the skating rink). So I'm describing my fly green dress to her... Why did she have the SAME dress! In Orange! And shoes to match! Lord knows our moms probably got the dresses at the same store, lord have mercy. But we were fresh to death!

And this is why we get along.

We're going out Saturday after work. Watch out East Point!

I'd have a spongebob car.

Is it just an Atlanta thing? A few minutes ago I was walking down the street and a caddy passed me. With a verizon logo on the side. Complete with "can you hear me now? Good." on the trunk side.

This is not new to me. I've seen nesquik, Hawaiian punch, m&ms, tropical skittles, slice soda, etc, on car doors, complete with the car painted the exact color of the product.

Its pretty neat. B said you have to find the decals online and get custom paint, while Kesi and his mom agree that you should be able to contact the company.

Its almost always a big old school car that has the logos on it. Right now we're riding in a new Yorker... Hmm. They also seem to be geared towards kids products. I think I'd want a cartoon on my car. Like, spongebob, or bloo from "Foster's." lmfao!

So do they do that where you're from? Or are we in the A the most fortunate to have rolling advertisements?
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Two thoughts

1. I have been blogging every day because I found out that you can email posts straight to your blog. In the settings tab there's a spot where you can create an email address for your blog and mail straight to it. Yay! Only you can't add pics or labels. I can just add those in later...

2. I want some m&m's. Ok, not just any, but the ones that say something. Maybe, happy birthday, or yoj- what Lauren and my DC peeps call me, or anything awesome. Giving a person monogrammed m's is such a cute idea! I wonder if they do peanut or just plain...
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face head ass

so in case you hadnt heard, mtv's yo mama is coming to the atl. my bro in law and his best friend are the jone kings. we decided that they should definitely try out.

here's a two of the jokes i heard from them this weekend:

your mama got a grill made out of marta tokens.

your mama sprays afro sheen on her back.

but if you ever been joned, snapped on, or chumped off by someone from the A, then you know there are no mama jokes really. we think the name of the show should be changed to "Face head ass."

all the jokes around here involve one or more of those words. for example: the dude from the party with the suit and tie was refered to as "ole yung joc face." i dont know why this is, but believe that when the show airs, that's what you'll hear more than mama jokes.

girlfriend, and other things i heard.

1. when was the last time you said the word girlfriend? not as in girlfriend/boyfriend, but like, "girlfriend, i like your shoes," or "girlfriend, did you see that show last night?" meanwhile, this man, a thirtyish straight white man who has probably never used it in that context, called my coworker girlfriend. like, "well girlfriend, i'll just just let them know you sent me." what? boo. i get that alot from people who i dont think see black people that often and must assume we talk like that. essentially they are playing themselves. but i was stuck between laughing and being mildly offended.

2. i am so tired of hearing people brag about "switching lanes." ok you got a nice car, but why is your ability to move from one lane to the other supposed to amaze me? i mean, even justin timberlake said it in "summer love." also poppin bottles, and talk of your quarter to 8. getting old dear, gettin old.

3. my friend X wanted it to be known that he never said my breasts were saggy. BUT! he did say that they would be by the time i turn 23. and seeing as how i'll be 23 pretty soon, he was wrong. like i said. boom.

that is all.

QUICK HITTERS

GENERAL:

*Who is that kid dancing in the monica video and counting money in the young dro video? i'm sorry but that is a funny looking lil boy.

*despite all his protests, doesnt it sound like big boi is saying he and andre are breaking up in the 3rd verse of "The train"? cant really quote it but when you listen he's talking about touring alone, which has happened. but he says something like, "but now i call upon my crew." hmm... still love 'Kast and the album though, so...

*"i hope that youre ready, cuz i'm about to bring you." why change the lyric from "show" to "bring," danity kane? imagine my annoyance when singing the version i know, in which dawn (i think) belts it out, only to be left in the wrong key. oops.

SPECIFIC:
*we got our second ticket yesterday for our malfunctioning seatbelt. crap! college park is running game. *bleep*

*yay lauren! i hope you and your comfy shoes had a great first day.

*i'm going out clubbing (sp) tonight and tommorow is X's birthday. yay! partay!

*comcast wont gimme my money back. i accidentally paid them twice (their fault) and now i gotta wait to get my money back. i'm feelin so broke right now.

obsessions

madam's inspiration:

MUSIC
i've always loved music. and i've loved all kinds, except most jazz. i play the violin and have a guitar that i can only toy with. i'm really into foreigners right now: MIA and lady sov are high on my list. and of course i love to dance. dancehall is my groove of choice.

LOST AND BONES
my absolute favorite shows on tv right now. they competed with times last year but now one's at 8 and the other is at 9. both are brilliantly written and make me feel smarter for watching.

UNDIES
i have about 70ish pairs. why? in high school, i got it in my head that no matter what i was wearing/doing, having a cute pair of drawers would make me feel confident. it was my lil secret. they are mostly from vickies (pink line) but occasionally i'll find nice ones from target or marshalls. i'm a fan of innuendo, so i own a few with felix the cat and cookie monster.

WRITING AND BLOGGING
i've been writing since i can remember. the first i can recall was a story about my imaginary pet fish. i was 5. i'm always thinking of new things to blog about, and occasionally stealing ideas...

MY PHONE
its a tmobile SDA. i use it to type most of my entries. also to read all you guys' and listen to music. and text and take pix and play games and im... i always have it on me just in case things get boring. strangely i dont talk on it much...

THE WORK COOKIES
no, that's not a euphemism. my job has the best cookies. i have to put myself on restriction when i feel my addiction is getting out of hand. these things are so good they were part of lauren's birthday present this year.

WRITERS
especially roald dahl, anne rice and chuck palahniuk. they are the best in their respective genres. i would rather read MATILDA, QUEEN OF THE DAMNED or FIGHT CLUB than watch them any day.

BOONDOCKS
i have uncle ruckus singing 'new niggas' as a ring tone. i been reading the strip since high school and have all the books. aaron mcgruder is a genius and inspiration for the comic i have yet to write.

there ya have it. my obsessions.

i dont even like jelly.

so... i purchased dane cook's RETALIATION on tuesday. funny shit. we've been listening to it in the car since then and cracking up to the point of almost tears.

my favorite is his jokes on "nothing fights," in which a couple pretty much hates each other and picks fights about the dumbest stuff. kesi and i do it for fun, just to get a reaction from people, then we start laughing.

just my luck mr cook's VICIOUS CIRCLE was on hbo friday morning at about 3am and we stayed up and watched it. around the part where he's talking about wanting to have 19 kids, i realize i have a funny-guy crush on him. he's adorable. and i'm so going to see EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH when it comes out.

so anyway you should too. i just want everyone to know he's funny and i think he's cute. the end.

ps: suri cruise is the cutest baby ever. still convinced she will help her dad with that whole antichrist thing... but she's a lil muffin!

chicken pox: a story with no real point.

althea got chicken pox last week. she came back to work with scratch spots all over her. adults still GET chicken pox? gee whiz...

i got chicken pox when i was 7. i may have contracted it at my grandma's funeral. one of my cousins had it and gave it to everyone. but she also lived upstairs from me so i may have been a carrier...

my grandma lula mae was born and raised in monks corner, sc. my grandfather too. as it goes, my mom's dad was born in rome, ga, so i have a deep southern heritage that i try to deny. anyway, monks corner was a 14 hour ride away, on a coach bus with family members who i knew and didnt know. my mom sat in the front and my dad in the back. not because they needed to be separated, but because they werent together anymore and werent bound by compromise to sit near each other. i would bounce back and forth on the bus to one of them or the other, and bug relatives for snacks and to hear what they were listening to on their tape players.

south carolina was CUNTREE! as compared to the biggest city in connecticut, complete with projects and latin gangs, i was in the deep woods. whole new experience. big as crickets and mosquitoes... i swear i had never seen a field before then. a "hills are alive, hey is that corn?" field. i played until dusk with distant cousins and came in the house dark as a tollhouse chocolate chip.

it was there that i smelled the worst smell i'd ever. some meat maybe, boiling on the stove. even with the lid on it filled the house with the stench of death. chitlins. the "c" must be a typo. i asked my mom what it was and she told me intestines. i thought she was joking. ew. i picked at that night's food.

that small town was beautiful. even though i was there to say good bye to my grandma i have really good memories. but that doesnt suprise me. she lives in every scarf or blanket i ever crocheted. its funny, all my life, she was sick. diabetes. she had her leg amputated and her prosthetic would sit next to her when she was watching tv, with a flat black loafer and a knee high stocking. i would touch it and look at her missing lower leg, but i wasnt afraid.

she made great iced tea. it had a whole lemon in it. cut, of course.

so i got chicken pox at her funeral. couldnt go to school for a week, and i actually liked school then. my dad had to take care of us when my mom was at work. we played all day and at one point i climbed into our jennifer couch and made my dad look for me before i jumped out and scared him. i know he was probably thinking my mom was gonna kill him if i wandered out into the street in a fever hallucination. he once sent me back home without bathing me and she's still mad about that.

dont they call it shingles when older people get pox?

the joy update...

1. lauren will be here wednesday. i call a monopoly on wednesday so we can go to the movies.

2. if someone offers you something, dont say, "yes, if you have it." if they didnt have it, why would they offer it?

3. there's this song i liked when i was younger called "the one." i used to think it was a happy song, but now i realize its not. here's part of a verse: "I slave the day away, giving you all i can, ready to reach new lows, dying to wash my hands." wow.

4. i decided to sleep under my own covers last night because i almost beat up kesi monday night after he kept stealing the covers from me and waking me up. i slept through the night but we didnt sleep very close to each other. i felt a little lonely...

5. a crack head said that anyone who didnt think i was beautiful was a fag. i was scattered- scared and flattered. he should know though, that gay guys think i'm hot too.

6. read jamiel.blogspot.com. the girl's a genius. that is all.

i dont even think four people read my blog.

Four jobs I've had in my life:
1. waitress at Mac's (closed)
2. errand girl
3. got damn CVS cashier
4. whatever it is i do now.

Four nicknames I've been given:
1. yoj- lauren
2. "steps"- by my cousins
3. joy-joy- by the redundant
4. bitches aka "jessica jiggles"- by kesi and his crazy brothers

Four movies I would watch over and over:
1. anything with Jake Gyllenhall
2. carrie
3. little mermaid
4. Finding Nemo

Four places I have lived:
1. bridgeport, ct
2. riverdale, ga (wacktown, usa)
3. east pernt, ga
4. college Park, ga- home to gangstas and perpetrators alike.

Four TV Shows I love to watch:
1. lost
2. Good Eats (alton brown is too smart for cooking)
3. The Boondocks
4. dr. 90210

Four places I have been on vacation:
1. cumberland island, Ga- complete with wild horses
2. DC a buncha times.
3. san fernandina. FL
4. St louis. Mo

Four people I could not live without:
1. lauren
2. kesi
3. jabre
4. the guy who puts his name on my paychecks.

Four of my favorite foods:
1. blue doritos
2. anything italian
3. burgah king
4. chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream

Four folks who I have tagged:
1. kesi
2. kyle
3. shaany
4. bre

the hate list

-dedicated to lauren(better to write it down than keep it in and get fat and explode) and aaron mcgruder.-

this is a compilation of random things that bug me on a daily basis. there's plenty more things, these are just the ones i thought of in the half hour trip from my house to school on the train...

*emo titles ("panic! at the disco" is the one i hate the most. also, "a little less 16 candles, a little more touch me." how bout a little less need for research when trying to listen to a song? most of the kids who listen to fall out boy are too young to know who samantha fox is. i barely know who she is.)

*old people who think things that teens do are so much worse than anything they did. Sometimes it is but they definitely overexaggerate on things.

*people who sigh in your face or put money on counters instead of in your hands. (this happens to me alot at work. alot.)

*wet money. Why is it wet!?

*people with love handles who wear low rise jeans with short tees. youth is not qualification for wearing low rise. do some crunches.

*hipster haircuts on dudes. (Do you really need to comb that much hair forward?)

*guys who talk to you when you are ACTIVELY trying to ignore them.

*the assumption that guys and girls cant be friends.

*white men who call me homegirl. Stop. No more.

*hilary duff

*people who get mad when people when people look at your breasts for like, a second. As long as you dont outwardly stare... I mean, theyre out there for a reason

*religious intolerance in the scale of hate. This excludes any episode of south park and any jokes about scientology or mormonism

*people who think they can be models cuz theyre pretty.

*thinking all male hairdressers/ dancers/ designers are gay

*people who dress like school is a club. all that makeup is uncalledfor.

*random people in the background of your pics.

*people who judge when you say you were 16 when you went on birth control. (bonus points if they have kids)

*most republicans.

*waking up before 10 am

*that "youre beautiful" song. his voice drives me up a damn wall.

*people who let their kids run all over them. or scream in public. all those kids on "Nanny 911" while we're at it. who lets it get that far?

feel free to add on or make your own. hate is natural. better to blog than kill someone. i often have to weigh the pros and cons of murdering the reciever of my hate. please remember that i mostly love...