Random.

I'm so tired of taking the train at night. Maybe there's something to this driving thing. Of course, I'd need a working car, and more money with which to buy gas. $13 a week to get around aint half bad. Compared to what I could be paying. Sometimes I wish some rich person would leave me money in their will. But I don't know any rich (monetarily) people, do I?

This white guy and black guy got into it on the train. Monday the white guy was saying this blind woman was faking and this woman called him a cracker. "I love black people!" this is his response. Fine. At least 2 don't like you though. So Tuesday night he strikes up a convo with someone. "what you reading about?" "black people." "you don't have to get racist..." what? That's not racist. Clearly he was reading about negroes. So he goes into his "I love black people again," and the man next to him for some unknown reason besides general craziness of the 1130PM variety, starts calling him a cracker too and tells him not to touch him. The white guy gets defensive and tells him he'll touch him if he wants. They fight, and some toothless "5% nation prophet" pulls them apart. This is all what I heard, as I didn't turn around. I have no desire to see these fools act ignant. I also have no desire to have the woman who looks like the Cat Lady off the Simpsons curse at the invisible person next to her. Maybe that's just me.

Went shopping Tuesday. Ask anybody, I am the bargain shopper. I went in there and spent $46 on 3 tops and 2 pairs of shorts, and some VS lipgloss. I averaged $7 an item. :D Kesi says he can never find nice stuff for him, but he just doesn't have my knack. I don't break the bank on either of us. The most expensive thing I ever bought him was some Tims. I think...

I'm noticing that our years are starting to run together. For the life of me I cannot remember where we went for our 2nd anniversary. There was Houstons, Longhorns, red lobster, and Magiano's. No idea a about the second year. Lmao, and don't ask me about gifts. Wonder what it'll be like 20 years down the line. What conjunction of 8 different events will I share with our kids?

I am gonna start writing in a diary again. I bought a cute Indian designed one. Burgundy with gold henna design. I stopped when my entries got few and far between. That was some years ago. Then I started blogging, and at first I was writing every little thing, then people started making lil "real life" comments about my opinions and we were having internet gang wars and shit. Plus there are certain things I CAN'T say on the net because they require hella back story, and some are like unspoken within the family and friends, or secrets I'm supposed to keep, which I just don't wanna get into. But I have no particular outlet and sometimes I go in circles in my head. So diary it is.

Is it just me or, when people shake your hand all the time even though you're already acquainted with them, does it just come off really fake? My manager does that all the time. Come on. I guess someone told him it made us feel good. Who ever came up with that idea should take a hand shake to the face.

I almost had an encounter with the Notorious Ex. I have mentioned him before but I just decided to start calling him that like 2 days ago. I won't mention the thing that almost led us to be in the same room, but I will say I saw a cell phone pic of his wife (fat-ish) and his kids (adorable) and his body which thankfully was cropped so his head wasn't in the picture. I think if I would have seen his face, what he looks like 7 years later... I look at pictures of him that I still have in my photo albums and it goes from "I remember this day," to "I remember what happened," to this state of mind where I know this is all the past and I am a different person, and I kind of don't recognize him. I will say that looking at his kids was a strange experience. Knowing that I once wanted to have kids with him... I think that things are good for me the way they are, but I wonder about them. They're gonna have a crazy dad. I know one day we'll all meet up, but for now I'd like things to just a memory.

You know what I want? A calf massage. While watching ANTM and eating Wendy's chicken nuggets. I'm gonna make that happen. Holla!
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