Thursday 13:The joy-tionary

I have a way with language. A... Finesse, if you will. The ability to make up words that eloquently express what I'm trying to say, without having people go, "what?!"

At least that's what I like to think. Sometimes, being that I use ACTUAL words that people don't know, sometimes when I use my made up words they think I'm being cute and trying to make them look silly for not knowing what I'm talking about.

Anyways, here's a few words and phrases that are seared into my personal lexicon. Most of them are actual words or word derivatives, they just mean something different in my world. I even used some in a sentence!

Bedorable- so adorable it warrants moving down the alphabet from a to b. "my cousin BJ is so bedorable! He looks just like his big brother did when he was a baby!"

Boom-boom- I have made my point, albeit comically, and usually a simpler and wronger answer than the actual reason. "the reason cop cars don't have seat cushions in the back is because people don't wanna spend tax money making sure the person that robbed them has a smooth ride to jail. Boom-boom."

I'm over it- I don't want to talk about it. Usually said when something is so confusing or angering that I can't complete a thought or a sentence.

Mashed potato- a person who is mushy and emotional. See: the owner of this blog. Coined on my 5th anniversary with Kesi, when I started crying at maggianos.

Mmmkay- an affirmative to people who overexplain or ask me something stupid. Said like Mr Mackey from South Park. "could you make sure my coffee is hot?" "mmmkay."

Owneenknowhatatelyafolk- "I don't even know what to tell you folk." said when a person hints that they need something instead of just coming out and asking. "dang, I don't have enough money for lunch!" "Owneenknowhatatelyafolk."

Patois- private parts. Coined by my brother and our friend Sam (who said it sounded like a French word) when I tried to explain to them that Jamaican is a nationality, not a language. "Don't touch my patios!"

Rafiki- in the past. Rafiki, of course, is the monkey from the Lion King who said "it doesn't matter, its in the past!"

Shnookie- a loved one. Said in a deep, manly voice. From the cartoon "Invader Zim," wherein an alien baby said his earth name, Noogums, was inbefitting of him as a warrior. When asked what his real name was, he replied "Shnookie!"

Skeetastic- lasciviously sexual and highly freaky. A combination of the slang word "skeet" and "fantastic."

Sneeze- the smell of breath. A smell that apparently only Breezy and I can identify.

Under-face- your chin. Not sure how it started but we say it all the time. See also: back-face, also known as "hair."

Your face/ your butt- a line of dialog between my brother and I when we're just being jerks to each other. "your shirt is dirty." "your face is dirty!" "your butt is dirty!" it can get more intense and hilarious when we talk about things that don't characterize a face or a butt, like, "you left the door open." "you left your face open!" "you left your butt open!"

Feel free to use these terms in your everyday life.

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