update

so... how come the area of the police dept where you would your case# is closed on weekends? whats that about? i called when my mom got home at 6pm, and the chick had such a tude on the phone. she was like, "well you gone have to wait til monday anyway." shut up stank woman.

also, after looking at my bank statement online, i realize that the gas station he was hustling at was on cleveland avenue. so this dude came ALLLL the way downtown, to skulk around a hotel looking to steal stuff. he walked into the gift shop's back storeroom and probably would have racked up except my manager was in there, so he made up an excuse, talking about he was trying to apply for a job. so he disappeared and went around to the back of my store and stole my stuff. easy pickins.

i am using kesi's extra phone until i can get my phone replaced. i have to get my case number from the police dept before they can even ship it out. considering how close the warehouse i could have had it by monday if the apd worked on weekends. suckers.

i think thats all.

im pretty sad. i went to a baby shower saturday ande cooked friday. no pictures of either... i have no camera! sigh.

robbed

yes, i was robbed.

i was at work, my purse was in the back of the store, as usual, and some guy was lurking around and stole it. he left my purse in one of the back rooms, empty of anything of value to him.

that includes my wallet, which had no money in it but did have my marta card, my check card, and my ID. my camera, my phone, and my brand new zune. so pissed you guys. im more calm now... i cried, kicked shit, yelled a lil, and drank on an empty stomach. but now im waiting for a call from the atl police. well technically my mom is waiting for the call. she's the only one in the house with a phone as of yet. my bro still hasnt got his stuff together since he was robbed.

im wondering why this keeps happening to my family. what did we do? we're nice, god fearing people! we take precautions! geez man... its just shitty.

and he stole my pepper spray. womp. and i cant go get more cuz i dont have an ID so i cant get into starship! super womp.

passing the time

when im not reading your blogs, there are alot of obscure (to me) and entertaining sites i like to peruse. here's a list, for your enjoyment:

failblog
it is what it says it is. pictures and videos of people failing. my favorite as of late is the chick who has a "success is not an option" tattoo.

passive aggressive notes
ive been waiting for my own passive aggressive note to come my way so i could submit it. i strive to be not passive aggressive in my written work, simply because of this blog.

awkward family photos
i must say, i have a weird family photo. actually is me and my date for the 8th grade prom. i wrote about him, but ive yet to finish categorising my entries so i dont know where it is. anyways he had the "robot hands on waist" action, and i smiled way too hard. some of these are way worse though.

why the fuck do you have a kid?
i actually found this reading katy perry's blog. the question is valid. especially when you watch the salvia videos. why do people wanna do that stuff? this site should be forwarded to childrens svcs for real.

fark video.
if you havent seen keyboard cat... please enjoy.

you know you dead azz wrong
people are a mess and our blog friend durty mo aint afraid to say it.


texts from last night
i found the fun in binge drinking!!!

what about chex? and i really like french toast.

ya'll, i love the lord. i really do. he heard my cry. and hearkened every... sumn i dont know the words, ok? i know that in my heaven, there shalt be the most important meal of the day. some dont agree apparently. honestly, why did he bring mabel up there if she wasnt gonna hold the mic all the way up to her mouth? bless em...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYqM9-Fj0Pg

i for some reason cant imbed. but itll be worth it to click the link.

too much time on youtube

for some reason youtube and blogger are in hater mode, so i posted the urls...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WFdlxr3uso

juney boomdata- whats up with that cookie
*i have a love hate relationship with this song because i think its sexist (and racist... he said "that wet wet mexican" in one line. if he didnt then whatever he did say was gross, lol) but i like the beat. and this video is funny*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnNyfGHUEHA

kanye- good morning
*its so cute!!!!!*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2ikj4x-zls

robyn- who's that girl
*"i just cant deal with the rules, cant take the pressure" me neither girl. this song is lyrically on point.*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGE34VAqYTk

super mario rescues the princess

ha!!! i never noticed he was basically calling her a slut...

ps- ive decided that if you feel like you need to comment on my blog but you dont actually SAY anything, of if i feel like you didnt READ my blog entry, i will delete your comment or ignore it. dont be wack. i get my lil email saying someone posted a comment and then i read the comment and i get a headache. stop!!! just dont say shit. lurk!!! that is all.

A fence called Jesus

These are the texts I sent La at 1125-1130 PM, July 3, 2008.



*Oh God someone is singing and my mp3 player died. He's apparently singing about an "ice cream girl" and asking people what their flavor is. And now there's people playing his song!!! Oh God! This must stop!



*I wish I was lying. Now he's dancing! This is fooley Wang to the fullest!



*And people got the nerve to wanna join in! I hope you're not asleep. I can't take it Jesus.



They eventually left and came back singing a "love in the club" remix. Trust I got video. I'll have it up here ASAP. Just to clarify they texts, apparently I thought he was trying to sing/ hit on a chick, then his homey came up with the casio joint playing the song, and another dude had a camera... Apparently this will be on youtube tonight so if you see a chick with an afro, a frown, and a wife beater, that was me just trying to make it home from work cuz that Negro was in my face. His name... Was SKIIBO. No lie. Can't make it up.



This is just why I takes my camera everywhere.



Jesus, you were a carpenter, now please be a fence.

Jury duty pt 2

Well this part is a little different than part 1. For one, I was writing that as it happened, and I couldn't do that with this part as I was actively in the court room and phones and such were not allowed. So here's what happened:

They called my name. #7. I literally let out a sigh of disgust. And so I went down to the 5th floor and stood in line while a lady told us what would be happening. We'd go in and be surveyed (guadiere, I thing that how its spelled. Pronounced "gwa-deer") and chosen or not chosen to be in the jury based on our answers.

So of course being #7 I was right in the front. Center. And the dude next to me would NOT SHUT UP. At first it was funny, but then he said, "he's guilty," when we found out what the charges were. Not funny. Btw it was the state vs this young immigrant who was accused of sexual assault of a 12 year old girl. So yeah dude, shut up. The immigrant dude looked like he was having it rough up on Wright St. His eyes were red the whole time. I know they treat rapists hard up in the joint, and with good reason, so...

Certain things could be implied by the line of questioning. There was forensic evidence. If the forensics did not incriminate the defendant, I don't believe we'd be there. You know? If the DNA was someone else's, we wouldn't be looking at this guy. Also, the way the defense lawyer asked his questions made it seem they could only put reasonable doubt in your head, maybe, possibly. On a good day. I wouldn't want him reppin me. He wasn't too tight in the game.

So we get on with the questionaire. Do you know anyone in the courtroom? Would the influx of Latino immigrants into the US effect you negatively in this case? Do you have police or military relatives? Do you watch law and order or CSI? (when they asked this question, people were like, what about "cold case"? What about "48hrs"? Damn, just say yes. You get the idea.) Has anyone close to you been arrested? do you have an negative experience with the police? Positive? Do you have a scientific, counseling, child care background? Do you have children? On and on. And then there were 2 questions I was the only one who answered in the afirmative: do you speak Spanish? Were you personally the victim of a sex crime?

Now, admitting you were the "victim" of a sex crime can be a hard thing. First of all you have to move past victimization. I don't feel like a victim. It was a part of my past and makes me who I am. By not saying that it happened, 2 things occur. I make myself ashamed and a liar. (btw, Mr talkative gave me the side eye when I answered this question. I was actually thankful he clammed up and looked at me differently.) I did no more to deserve the actions brought upon me than I did when my house was robbed when I was 19. The other thing is a perpetuation that its going to be something we should be silent about. Its not. I once sat in a room where a large majority of females admitted to having been a "victim" too. No one would have known otherwise. But by us saying it, and there being males in the room hearing what we had to say, I can guarantee it had an effect on them. So while I am pretty sure I wasn't the only one who was involved in a sex crime, I was the only one to admit it. And that's fine. I don't want people to think they can ever be in a room full of people and assume that none of the women there have been offended. And next time, maybe every one would be able to admit it.

As far as not knowing Spanish... Really? 60 people in the room and the only ones who speak Spanish are me and the defense? These people had a crazy diverse background, and I was the only one who could communicate with the people who are literally running to live in our city? Boo!

So moving on. After this, we took a lunch and then it was specific juror questioning. Something I found funny was one man's response:

"where does your wife work?"

"oh she's retired."

"from?"

"north Carolina."

Dude. Not what she meant. I really wanted to laugh.

My questionaire was long. I talked about my brother's and uncles' military service, my dad's and cousin's arrests, my functionality in Spanish, whether or not my personal experience with the crime would bias me (I said it wouldn't. I'm able to see that this guy is not the person that hurt me), and my job. After that, I went in the hallway and squeezed in next to a nice old lady who was eventually chosen. I'd first seen her earlier because she was sock-footed. Someone had taken her shoes! What the? She was 74! And walking around the courthouse since she'd gotten there with no shoes on. Her daughter came after lunch and brought her a pair from her house. We talked for a while, and she was talking to me for a while. It took me a second to realize that Jackie was her daughter that died of diabetes in 2004 (yes, we really talked) because she talked to me as if we'd known each other since back in the day. She grew up in warm springs, the home town of Eisenhower, I think she said. And her dad worked for him. Was he the one in the wheelchair? That's who she was talking about. Anyway, we talked about her time as a private investigator at "Girls Friday" in roswell. That name reminds me of a strip club even though I know where it came from.

So after a while, a long while, remember I was #7 of 50, we went back into the room and the judge talked to us about "striking" jurors. He said they'd take a 15 minute recess and we'd be out by 6. Lemme say that first of all, we weren't. 2ndly, I'd been in that building since 8am and I'd been up since 6am. So I was beat. After almost a half hour, the lawyers came back and striking began. Now, I've seen them do this OUT LOUD before but never in this "passing notes in class" way that was occuring before me. No one said A WORD for another 20 minutes. A court worker passed a. Few sheets of paper back and forth, writing here and there and passing, whispering, while we sat there bored and not knowing what's going on. Then finally they had a jury and they called 13 people and then the judge thanked us and we were on our way. It was 630! I spent 10.5 hours in there only to not get picked. And I know that the fact that I was the only one who admitted to what I did was the reason why. It was the only thing that set me apart to the point of being a "biased juror." meh, whatever. I could see how that could hurt your case, lol. I went to kesi's house and went to sleep. Now I just sit back and wait for my $25.

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Jury duty pt 1

*This was written in the juror waiting room before I was sent to a judge. There'll be more on that specifically later on. There's a lot to mention. I will say, clearly, that I did not get picked, so there will be full disclosure.*

I've been up since 615am. Ate my breakfast of oatmeal and Vault and took a shower. Got dressed and tried to leave the house. "you can not go to court dressed like that!" ok, so I had on a fuschia top with a dancing monkey on it (which some have referred to as racist, but its an aeropostale shirt and its cute), and I was thinking more of my picnic date with Kesi in Centennial after I'm done here (because they never keep me long), but I knew she was right. It did make me laugh a little after a while. But um, its hot outside and I was dressing for comfort. I aint putting on a dress! And certainly not tweed pants, as she suggested. I changed into a blue Nike golf shirt. I really look like I'm gonna golf today. I have on tan above the knee capris- I know these type of shorts have a name, but usually I would just barely be waking up this time of day, so- and some loafer sneakers with tan, blue, pink and lime dots. I actually saw a guy with a similar outfit on who looked like he actually owned clubs.

Anyway, I get to the courthouse and they take my camera temporarily. I just gotta make sure I keep this raffle ticket they gave me. I remembered to take my knife out of my purse, didn't think of the camera... Oops. anywhoot, I get to the 7th floor and there's this line that stretches to eternity, because they're not letting people in as a group. You have to check in first and there's 2 people at a windo checking in oh about 300people. Give or take. Maybe 200. Still, that's a lot of people. And I'm tired! I'm listening to Frank Ski, and apparently its Usher Day. Btw, his album sounds pretty wack. His son sounds adorable. Put him cooing for an hour on wax and I may head to Target. But this album? Bah. Not that I own any usher... I hold my r+b dudes to a very high standard. I have Maxwell, Robin thicke, um.... Shoot that's it. I think. I've digressed again.

So I get in the room, and then we watch a movie with channel 11's own Brenda Wood, all about what the hell we're doing here. I don't remember what they said. I was paying attention but my brain was still asleep. I just realized I may be the youngest person in the room. Lol someone in here's last name is "Cooch!" *dead*

So I've been sitting here since then and I am trying to hold on. Reading and playing on my phone. I finished my book 2 days ago. It got really good, at the last 3rd, things started getting really twisted. I mean even moreso than usual.

*****************
At 11ish, I got chosen for jury selection. Of course I can't tell you anything about it. I'm eating lunch now... If I get chosen for the jury then I won't be able to comment on the case until a verdict comes in. If I don't get chosen, you'll hear all about it tomorrow. Some funny things have happened already. Funny odd, not necessarily funny haha. Til later...
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random

isnt this a cool lil pic? my brother doodled it after kesi's brother sent him a text msg about seahorse sandwiches (all very strange, i know, and i cant explain it). what kills me is that this lil drawing has so much to it! what also kills me is that he got all the art talent from both our parents. i mean, i cant draw worth a ding damn. i can tag though... i did some grafitti on the same paper. not my best work, so i didnt bother to take a picture of it, lol.

kesi and i went to see "semi pro" last week. Good movie. funny. It wasn't at anchorman level, but I enjoy will ferrel in general, lol. That sex scene had me dying though! I really wanna see Horton hears a who but I don't know if he wants to. Meh.

I'm listening to the first DK album right now. Still bumpin! I'm resisting the urge to just belt it out in the streets right now. I mean, this album, there's maybe only 1 song I don't like and its near the end, so it doesn't stop my flow at all. *oh, oh oh, we show stoppin, show, show stopin!* I can't wait til Tuesday! I'm going to get the album 2nd thing (after my bathingsuit, which my baby is buying for me). Its called "welcome to the dollhouse." has anyone else seen that movie? Its so funny! Ms lady and our brothers must have watched it a thousand times! "wiener dog!!" lmao. Please, if you haven't seen it, watch it. Its gotta be one of the best indie movies I've seen. I ended up with this weird crush on Brendan Sexton because of that movie and one where he played a lil thug who liked this puerto rican girl whose dad was abusive. Hurricane streets! Oh my God that one was even better than WTTD. And he was in empire records. With liv Tyler and Rene zelwiger. Marvel at my encyclopedic knowledge of 90s movies featuring awesome actors, not just "movie stars."

This dude just asked me if I knew anyone who wanted to buy a psp for $50. Boy, if you don't get out my face! That reminds me of this lady Friday, who came in the store and tried to pay with a 50... Turns out it was fake. Turns out, she sold her second tix cuz her team lost, and the random Joe on the street paid with a fake bill. She felt like pure ish. I mean, it didn't even have a watermark. It was a good fake, I will say that. If we didn't have the markers, we probably would have accepted it.

So yeah, tornado. Hit atl. Did you hear? I took pix, and I think as soon as I get a chance I'm gonna do a big photo catch up session (the pic my brother drew was in my drafts). I had to go to the highest floor of my hotel to take pix of the CNN center and the westin, which you can't even get close to. As far as Marta I'm pretty sure they're not letting people off at the CNN ctr station... Its all very crazy. I uttered about it so I'm not gonna repeat myself, but I will say that even during the storm I underestimated what exactly was going on outside my job. But everyone I know is ok. There were a few close calls, including a friend who I'm sure has to move and one whose back windows blew out from the pressure while she was driving home.

Last but not least, guess who I met yesterday? Andrew young!!! He's so sweet! And a joker. I told him I loved seeing him on the colbert report, and he says, "yall didn't know I could sing, did you?" lol I was trying to get deep with him, about the whole strike thing, and how he and mlk negotiated with colbert's dad to end the nurse's strike in SC. And his wife (who is bangin in that Claire huxtable way) said SHE didn't even know that story before he told it on tv. And despite all the bull and drama, this is why I love my job. Who among us can say they met and had a silly convo with the man who has a street not 2 blocks from my job named after him?

my new favorite song

Kid sister is on point. This song was literally stuck in my head all day Wednesday. I'm not a "classic nails and salon" (the spot over in my old neighborhood where I got my nails done exactly once) type of girl but I take it to heart in the general flyness area, you know?

So I had to cuss someone out today. Its a rare occasion when I have to take it there, but today I did. There's this security guard (I would call him top flight but I look at that as a term of affection) who, until last night would come in on some, "so and so wanted me to bring her a soda." now the chick who he may or may not be picking stuff up for is cool with me and I occasionally give her freebies. But I think he was taking advantage of it. Then there's another security guard who comes and gets parfaits at the end of the night since I'm just going to throw them away anyway. One day the wack security guard was with him, and I guess that since he sees me giving stuff out that that's all I do all day. But no.

So last night I closed the store (I was alone) and I had to pee. So the front door was closed, and usually the back door woulda been but I really had to go. So I come back and guess who is all up in the store, while its closed and my money is in the register? This Negro! Um, excuse me? "yall throwing out anything?" "I already tossed everything. Good night." this is what I said to him after I got scared out of my skin by the big black man standing in the back of the store who wasn't there when I left. I mean I was gone for maybe 2 minutes. The bathroom is right by the store.

So tonight, I'm moving back and forth putting stuff in the fridge room, and as I'm walking out, guess who I see? Now here's the point where I tell you the door had been locked all day because they were painting. So he somehow has a key or something and even if I had locked up last night it wouldn't have made a dif. "can I get some strawberries?" now, its 1115. I been closed. That's another thing that bugs me. Don't interrupt me after we close cuz the hospitality ends at 11 on the dot. "you need to stop coming through here." "where?" "this back door. We been closed and I don't need people coming in here unannounced.and you scared the shit out of me last night and I'm not the free shit lady." "damn. Sorry." I didn't say anything else to him, or should I say yell anything else to him cuz I had the attitudy tone and mean brow going. My supervisor is always going on about someone clocking us upside the head for our carelessness, and this is just why. I don't need uninvited guests while I'm counting my money. And whoa, you have a key? So do you just bust in after everyone's gone and help yourself? Cuz that's not hot.

Seriously guys. Kick up the prayin, lol. Every time someone does something dumb I'm praying for Jesus to be a fence.

Cosigning

I've mentioned before that my butt is getting to be serious. I know people are looking. I'm getting better about it. But every now and then...

"your man let you out the house with those pants on?"

Now this was asked of me by not some stranger, but a fellow employee of my fine establishment. Not once, but twice, oh, just in case I didn't hear him.

"well Johnny (when you say dumb shit I put your name out there), FIRST of all (girls in the A put special emphasis on first when they are trying to make a point) my man doesn't live with me. I own my house. Secondly, hour doesn't let me do anything. He doesn't try to control me. Thirdly, seriously Johnny? For real? What year is this? And finally, no matter what pants I have on this will still be a fire lookin ass that you can't touch." and I'm out.

I get a lot of this, "your man let's" or "your man does," as if I'm barefoot and pregnant, or even have a wedding ring on. Psyche! Then these same people turn around and hit on me as if that wouldn't make both of us triffling and as if they didn't just show how chauvinistic they are.

Like la said, get like me. I am a confident, capable woman, and maybe I ruin your hypothesis that women are golddiggers and want to trap a nigga. Cuz no matter how successful I believe my man will be one day, he is not at this moment ballin out of control, and I certainly am not trying to have his baby right now. Oh nooo. So scrap that theory. It might help you get your relationship game up.

Kesi himself has told me I'm mean to men. I just tend to ignore them cuz I know they can't offer me a thing but a wack line.





Ps: I'm about to go into sleep therapy tonight. I'll be bored out of my mind tonight so I'll be blogging on the experience. Pray for me!
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the omen

so last night was A (of ABC's) costume party. fun times. but not without personal issues.

first i couldnt find the previously mentioned gingham dress- i think i gave it to charity. but i have this really cute red calvin klein party dress that fits the idea.

i curled my hair before work so it would be cute for the party, but i couldnt find hair spray. and it was raining. so my hair was cute but not as cute as it coulda been. way too much body. bad sign.

so after work we headed to the party. it was B and me. i wasnt gonna dress up cuz i didnt wanna be the only one, but when i walked in all the girls were dressed so i went to A's room to change. i effed up and broke my zipper on the back of my dress. how many guys does it take to fix a zipper? apparently more than 4. finally i safety pinned it and rocked a scarf around my waist with the tail in the back. put on my shoes and i was ready to go!

A and his sister had some stuff called hunch punch. which was that sherbet and soda deal but with alcohol instead. random alcohol. but it was good. and i was a-drinkin and a-dancin. if my hair hadnt already been messed up it woulda been cuz it was hot in there. only girls had costumes on. there was:

a witch doctor
a fairy- dodged that one...
a sexy cop
a retro chick complete with afro
a cheerleader
a school girl
a home wrecker
many indescriminate costumes and
A's sister as mystique from Xmen.

by like the 3rd drink i was a lil goofy. i hadnt eaten since 5 pm so... no i didnt throw up. the witch doctor was taking pictures and this wack bronx bomber in a pink button down wanted to show off. he grabs my hips and pushes me so i'm bent forward and starts posing and grinding. WHAT? did i say we were having sex? his friend was just as bad. who wears a tie to a house party? everyone else is all tees and jeans, this nigga got on casual friday gear. boo... i need another drink.

at some point i went outside, and who's out there? C! he got the biggest hug. he found me a cute lil turtle in his back yard. how sweet! he had on a yellow rain slicker. i kept calling him "Man in the yellow hat" like curious george. did i mention C is very short? he said he was dressed as jermaine dupri. silliness.

you know, watching white girls dance is funny. you have never experienced life until you dance to a sean paul song with a girl named sally. it was all wiggles and funny faces. of course then mr casual friday starts dancing with me and literally holding me. so C starts singing and it was funny and i fell on the floor laughing. when i got up B was like you know you just didnt want to dance with that guy. true... so me and B start dancing to some slow songs and it was like prom or something. so we started doing little spins and dips. so cute.

so i was talking to the witch doctor later that night, looking at pictures and being friendly, when along comes pink shirt. he sits this girl down, on someone else's lap no less, then proceeds to give her a lap dance. are you kidding? no thanx. he was all, yeah girl, i see you, uh huh. ew. so i'm looking at pics, all 200 of them, and pink shirt wraps his arm around me and grabs the camera once he sees a picture of himself. then shows his friend the picture of me and him and states that i was "Representin." whatever. now i was moving backward from 200 and had gotten to 95 when he takes it completely out of my hands and starts flipping in the opposite direction. mind you, he's still got his arm around my neck. i move him and get up and go to A's room to ask who the hell invited this piece of wackness.

in A's room i start taking pictures. also i mention that i hope he's washed his sheets cuz we were lying on his bed. eventually we went back in the den and danced some more. the party had to end at 4 because of party laws- so we walked it out and people left. we stayed for a few more minutes, for no particular reason. A said i was gonna be his baby's daddy in 30 years, which is as wrong as it seems. B tried to holler at the retro chick as we were leaving. cute.

in all, its a fun time. next year, mark my words, i'm going as a dominatrix.

hello, pot? this is monica. youre black.

friends, in case you were wondering. one of the funniest lines.

so anyway, i'm at work right now, bloging, cuz in life, bitches be hating. and they always gotta hate over a man. ugh!

it all started with a kind gesture. lets set the scene.

nice chick: i was gonna bring these forms to you. i'm just so kind!
me: thanks. and shallow...(we laugh)... if i
can admit it about myself i can say it about you.
hater: can you admit that youre nosy?

see, right here i could have been like damn who was talking to you. instead, i answered her in my continued lighthearted manner. yes i am nosy, but mostly cuz i'm absent minded and when i tune back in i'm usually lost on the whole conversation whoever was having. they used to call me "Huh" in middle school.

i refused to give in to her passive aggressive silliness. it was highly hypocritical of her to ask me that, when earlier today she was all in mine about why am i going on break so early, and dont i eat at home, and what does anemia have to do with this whole thing... bear in mind i had been at work for 4 hours.

and now the bitches be hating theme song:

"so tell me what you on,
tell me what the hell you want,
need to worry bout your own,
i'm about to put you on blast...
i dont think you really want it..."
danity kane is doin the thang people.

i really think this stems back to her and my friend b. he used to date her, and was the one who said he was torn between kissing her and kicking her. i think she's jealous that we're close and she fucked up her chances with a good man. but i never told him to break up with her. it was obvious he should. but it was hard cuz he really loves her daughter.

now i think she thinks i'm running back to him telling her things. but the truth is, he doesnt care. and she thinks she's being sneaky, talking to like 4 dudes in the hotel, but everyone knows and no one gives a damn. between her and her best friend they are all high school, making their smart comments and spending their time thinking about me and feeling threatened over the fact that i'm cool with their man and former man. and her best friend is not doing a good job of disguising the fact that she's dating someone in our department. boo bitch... i dont want him.

so how long can i let this carry on, her little coy innocent yet snarky thing she's doing? its all just to see me get mad and snap on her so it looks like i'm ms crazy... but i'm a natural born talker, and i know how to have her whole shit laid out for everyone to see. i wouldnt dare incriminate myself so she looks good. i'm to smart for that. and for all she thinks she's got on me, i definitely got something for her.

"breeze... blowing in the wind... baby please believe i'm alright,
cuz its 70 degrees and sunny over here,
you can stay up out my ear."

ps: visit www.laurenashleigh.blogspot.com for other hating bitches.

oh hell no!

so i'm at work, chillin in the shop, when the girl from the bar lounge comes up to me and we chat. but first, backstory:

last winter, she, b, and i went to the bar down the street from our job. we sat in a booth with this guy, who we'll call joe, cuz he had a booth and was alone. while he was with us he made attempts to hit on me but of course i wasnt trying to hear that. besides the obvious reasons, he was hardly my type. stocky and bald, and in case you havent heard kesi once had hair down to his butt. and he's skinny. and the guy wasnt even cute. back to today:

she went to the bar monday night. she tells me he had been asking about me. apparently every time he saw her, he'd ask about me. boo. she repeatedly told him i have a man and am not even thinking about his ass... and this time he listened... and started hitting on her. eh?!? weren't you just trying to long distance holler at her girl? now he switches it up and is telling her how he's a freak and how big he is and bla bla. she was clearly in ew mode.

but here's the best part: after she told him she was hella not interested (Btw she wasnt alone, two other employee guys were with her), they talked and drank and then the bar closed. as she headed to the car he headed to his... scooter.

hold up. this nigga had a scooter? and not like a vespa, no, like a damn kiddie fold up razor scooter. oh, did i mention this bruh is 32? now i am 22, getting long distance hit on by a drunk bald dude on a kiddie scooter! he scooted his way home alone.
but what if she had, against any good judgement, decided to go home with his too old ass? how would she get there? would he have been a gentleman and let her ride while he walked? would both of them fit on it?

oh i lost it. i was in there dying cracking up. dying! i'm in icu right now, in a coma. cuz this nigga is trauma.

putting my 2cent in.

its 4 am and i cant sleep. i been thinking and i need to get this out.

i am fortunate enough to have 4 best friends. kesi, of course, lauren, a man who i call X on this blog (See post 2 way back when), and my newest, b, my club buddy. this deals with la and X.

no matter that people's intentions are toward me, when they cross my friends, we cant hang. la and X and i have a very close bond. a network of sorts where we know whats happening in each other's lives and where if it affects one, it affects us all.

this week one got affected. the affectee disrespected X so that it even hurt my feelings. and la's, and she got deep. you read it. and then the affectee disrespected la while attempting to and stated that she had 'nothing but love' for me. but that cant be true. affectee hates 40% of my circle.

i dont have to defend them. they do a good job on their own. but anyone who has a best friend knows they hold grudges long after you've let go. protective instinct. so i'm holding. and its unfortunate. bros before hos.

ps: if you have class you never have to tell anyone about it. to mention it 'negates the breezy.' lauren knows what that means. thats why she's the only chick in my circle.

Some things that's going on.

1. my dad's in town. he's staying in the guest room, at least until my mom finishes having him fix stuff. then he'll probably head to my aunt's house. not that my mom is kicking him out... a bug- a big one- crawled on my hand last night and he came running downstairs to kill it. i screamed my face off, but he noted that i wouldnt hang up the phone or even drop it. that was kind of nice that he rescued me, lol.

2. lauren tells me every day how much she hates houston. i hate it too. i wish she could come live here. she could, but two broke people does not a plane ticket make.

3. went out again last friday. i'm really bummed that i cant see kid capri this friday. my job is staying open an extra two hours for TD jakes mega fest. its a documented fact that church groups are terrible tippers. but i'll be working 54 hours this week. back to the club- fun times. some guy put his boner on my stomach while we were dancing. needless to say i didnt dance with him no more. ew.

4. i hate on that rihanna song but if i cheated on my man it'd probably kill him too. and i'm sorry, but that cassie song is a tad whorish. the guys heard she was good? who told? but its good to dance to. and beyonce! her video is insane! lauren, that's your ringtone. whoo!

5. i spent saturday and sunday morning with kesi. i felt like i hadnt seen him in ages, when it was really only a week. took goofy pix of him asleep. ah, love.

6. i cant wait for dom to get here so we can run through the fountain in centennial olympic park. i'm saving the moment for the two of us.

holla.

remember that episode where will and grace have that wierd neighbor ned and grace mumbles at him so she doesnt have to commit to him?

scene: me on the train writing my entry on ethnicity which i wrote already and managed to mysteriously erase from my phone) i'm annoyed at trying to remember what i wrote.

him: hi.
me: mmmhmm
him: what's your name? (i shrug) oh you dont have a name? (i say nothing) where you going?
me: work.
him: oh yeah, where? i'll come buy something. (i stare into my phone) where you work?
me: i'm not going to answer you so stop asking me stuff.
him: i'm tryin to be nice.
me: that's ok. you dont have to do that.

this is what happens just about every time a guy tries to holler at me. the problem is not that they holler, its that they dont know when to stop.

i asked two different women if i was wrong. clearly i wasn't in the mood to talk, but if just kept on trying! he could have moved on to another, more eligible woman rather than keep trying to break down this steel wall of what is apparently rudeness.

it is not rudeness. what it is is a hint. i'm not single. i'm not interested. i'm not at your level (way above it). sooner or later you will come across the fact that i have a boyfriend, plenty of regular friends, and am so much better than you that it will hurt your heart. kesi calls me bad for self esteem. and he's glad i actually like him. i just dont believe in wasting time. especially my own.

so... next time you get ignored by a pretty girl on the train, move on.

holla.

a wise man once said

dont you hate them old lyin ass hoes
smiling in your face but in her best friend's clothes?

ok, seriously it was lil flip. but it's true! ok, so she didnt smile in my face, but this is what i think happened:

my "friend" told her friends that she had a "hook up"-me- and that she would guarantee a good time for those friends from services rendered by the hook up. all this happened before talking to me.

said "friend" called me repeatedly at times when i was busy-i am always busy- and left messages, not to say hi, happy birthday (in 2 weeks) or happy anniversary (one week), but to say "i need something from you for free."

said "friend" also left IM's on my yahoo acct to say "oh, so you cant pick up the phone?" mind you, the last time i talked to her was october. and she was drunk and dismissive. and only wanted to talk about herself.

so no, i will not be rendering my services to you, my "clothes" if you will, for you will surely be flossing off of what i got, not what you earned, if i did so.

and shit, i dont have time to make sure your shit is squared away when mine is all over the place. but you wouldnt know that, cuz you never asked, did you. boo to you madam. boo to you.